The Seven NightsYou're in
Night one is on its way.
The first email should land within a few minutes. Then one a day for the next six days, each with a short video, arriving in the late afternoon so you see it before you leave work.
Do this now, before you forget
Open the first email and drag it into your main inbox if it landed anywhere else. Promotions, Updates, Spam, it varies.
If night one ends up in the wrong folder, the other six follow it there and you never see any of them. Thirty seconds now saves the whole week.
Before night one
You still have to give her the note.
The seven nights don't start until she says yes, and she can't say yes to something she hasn't read. This is the part most men put off, so here it is in four steps.
- Write it out by hand. A printed page reads as something you generated. Your handwriting reads as fifteen minutes you chose to spend on her.
- Leave it where she'll find it on her own. Her side of the bed, her bag, next to the kettle. Not the kitchen table with everyone around.
- Then walk away. Don't hand it over and stand there waiting for a reaction. You asked her a question. Let her answer it in her own time.
- Don't raise it for two days. If she wants to talk about it, she will. Chasing it turns a request into pressure, and pressure is what she's already braced against.
Lost the note, or closed the tab before you copied it? Nothing was saved, so you'd need to build it again. It takes about a minute.
Write the note againWhat's coming
Seven nights, one technique at a time.
You don't learn a whole routine on night one. You learn one thing, do it for ten minutes, and add the next one tomorrow. By night seven you're running the full sequence without thinking about it.
The forearm
Where most of the tension actually sits. Ten minutes, one hand, and she feels the difference immediately.
The sway
Thirty seconds that gets her whole arm to let go. This is the one that surprises people.
The palm
Working the fleshy parts of the hand, wrist down to the base of the fingers.
The web
The soft area between thumb and forefinger. Small spot, disproportionate effect.
The centre
The middle of the palm, worked slowly. Most people have never had this done properly.
The fingers
Each finger in turn, warmed between your palms. This is usually the one she asks you to repeat.
The full sequence
Everything joined up, both hands, start to finish. About fifteen minutes, and you'll know it by heart.
The part that matters most
Ask, then keep asking.
Everything in this program rests on her feeling in control of it. That isn't a nicety, it's the mechanism. Five things to carry into every night:
- Ask before you start, every time, even when she already said yes.
- Ask what feels good, and ask whether anything hurts. Then adjust.
- Check for arthritis or old injuries before you press anywhere.
- If she wants to stop, stop. No question, no disappointment on your face.
- Rings come off if they're going to catch.
Tell her plainly that this is entirely for her, and that it works better when she says what she wants. Most people stay tense out of habit. Reminding her to let go is part of the job.
Worth reading now
If she says no
Sometimes she will. It isn't a verdict on you, and it usually isn't about the note at all. She has heard versions of this before and nothing changed, so a certain amount of scepticism is earned.
How you handle a no matters more than the note did. Accept it without arguing. Leave it alone for two weeks. Use the techniques on yourself in the meantime, because the forearm work is genuinely good after a day at a keyboard. Then ask once more.
What you don't do is push. Pushing confirms the thing she's worried about, which is that this was about getting something rather than giving it.
There's a short audio on exactly this in your first email.
Not about the seven nights, but worth knowing
What people say about hi® and the training.
You're at the very start, so nobody has finished your seven nights yet. These are from people who have done the wider hi® training, including a massage therapist, a urologist, and a couple who went through the couples program.
"I've been a massage therapist for 30+ years and found the hi® Massager to be effective for myself, my friends, family and my clients. Recommend it Highly!"
K. Walker, CMT BodyBalanceTherapies.com, Houston, Texas"We were almost to our breaking point... It's done wonders for our relationship in 2 days."
Brittany & Trevor After completing the hi® training program Brittany and Trevor are certified hi® instructors and appear in our training materials."I recommend hi® as a first step to try for many couples, depending on their situation."
Clyde Corey, MD Board-Certified Urologist, Houston, Texas"When your partner knows that you're doing everything you can to care for them, they can get through just about anything. When you know your partner does the same for you, you feel the same way."
William C. hi® owner, age 57
Who's sending these
We've taught this to a lot of people
The hand massage is the first thing we teach in every live class, and it has been for sixteen years. It's first because it's the one anybody can do well on their first attempt, and because it asks nothing of the person receiving it.
If you get stuck on any night, reply to the email. It comes to us.
Drs. Steve & Wendy McGough, Women & Couples Wellness
One favour, at the end
On night seven we'll ask you two questions about how it went. Two minutes, and you can answer anonymously.
Your answers become what the next man reads on this page before he starts.